Wednesday 31 October 2012

Halloween 2012: And They Turned Into Stone

In my previous post, I mentioned that the Missus was in the midst of preparing my Halloween costume. I also asked readers to make a guess as to what my costume would be for this year’s Halloween. Unfortunately, no one came up with the correct answer (although some of you came very close!). Still, I thank you all for your wonderful contributions!

Anyway, without further ado, for this years’ Halloween, I am going to be…

Medusa, the Gorgon.

Yeah! I am the legendary Golden Gorgon!

And check out my venomous snakes: Mozambique Spitting Cobra, Gaboon Viper, Black Mamba, Puff Adder, Boomslang – all with googly eyes! “Sssssst…”

According to Greek mythology, anyone who looked into the eyes of Medusa instantly turned into stone.

To find out if this story might be true, I decided to take matters into my own paws; I went out to test my ‘Medusa’ prowess.

I was soon walking down the streets of Singapore, searching for unlucky victims. To my delight, I spotted something! It was an ox pulling a cart. As the ox stopped for a drink, I got into position and cast an evil look at the innocent bovine.

To my amazement, it turned into stone! Blimey!

So, the curse of Medusa is true!

Happy with my newfound magic powers, I began to search for more victims. First of all, I came upon a weird looking bird. Without thinking, I went into deep concentration and, within seconds…

…it turned into stone! (But I don’t know why it also got bigger and fatter?!?)

My extraordinary powers were fantastic. Soon, I was turning everything in sight into stone, including hoomans.

These men were having an innocent conversation and, guess what, I turned them into stone!

Next, I stumbled upon a Scribe and he too, with just one look, turned into stone!

This poor lady was simply waving at her friends. Unfortunately, I looked at her and… she turned into stone!

After walking aimlessly for a while, I came across some children playing next to the river. When they saw what was coming, they tried to flee into the river but it was too late…

…they turned into stone!

Despite their best efforts, none of them escaped my clutches.

My powers were such that I was even able to affect historical figures. Here’s poor old Stamford Raffles, one of the founders of Singapore, who died in 1826. Somehow, I managed to turn him into stone! Yikes!

Impressed with my limitless powers, I decided to set the bar higher. This time I would concentrate on  a mythical figure – The Merlion. This strange looking creature, the symbol of Singapore, has the head of a lion and the body of a fish. Man, that sounds scary!

First, I tried my luck on a baby Merlion. It worked like a charm – it turned into stone!

Without hesitation, I went for the mother Merlion and, guess what, she turned into stone too!

Please, my friends, be careful. Don’t look too closely at my photos. You never know, you too might be “turned into stone”!

Happy Halloween!

With love,
Homer

Saturday 27 October 2012

Preparing for Halloween and Dad's Barkday

Woof everyone!

Regular readers of my blog should know by now that every year, without fail, the Missus will dress me up in some whacky fancy dress costume. These ‘traumatic’ episodes started in 2007.

Here’s a recap of my past years’ Halloween costumes.

My first ever Halloween costume when I was in China in 2007. I was supposed to be a ghoul or a Demonic Dog… or something?!? Whatever.

For Halloween 2008, we were temporarily living in a hotel in Rotterdam, the Netherlands. The photo above shows Yours Truly dressed as an evil wizard who ate humans and ‘accessorised’ their bones.

By 2009, we had moved to Italy. Meet ‘Count Dogula’. Apparently I had an insatiable appetite for eyeballs!

2010's Halloween, during our second year in Italy, took a turn for the bizarre! Before I knew it, I had been ‘bestowed’ a strange new title. I had become ‘LORD Gaga’. “Gaga ooh la la… want your bad romance!”

Last year, I was supposed to be a pirate; just like Johnny Depp in Pirates of the Carribean. Sorry Johnny, I was told by many of my admirers that I looked far better than you ever did in a pirate costume!

And so to this year. I’m going to be something – I just don’t know what! The Missus seems to have a ‘fiendish’ idea for my most scary and powerful costume yet – she’s nuts.

You’ll have to guess what the costume is.

“Hee… Hee! Can you guess what I’m going to be? Hee… Hee!”

On another note, I want to take this opportunity to wish my Dad a (belated) Happy Barkday. I woof you so much!

Monday 8 October 2012

Homer's Hobbies

Woof! Woof!

I’ve been a busy dog lately. When I’m not hanging out with my new girlfriend, Pebbles, you can guarantee that I’ll be doing something useful around the house.

Let me show you what I mean...

Sometimes the Missus needs to pop out to the shops. Who better to chauffeur her around than Yours Truly?

Of course when we get back home with the groceries, someone needs to make the dinner.

Meet Chef Homer!!! Here I’ve prepared some scrumptious chicken pies. (Better than your Grandma’s recipe - Heheheh).

After twenty minutes…VOILA!

I’d better taste them first to make sure they’re good enough for the humans. ‘Slurp!’

After slaving over a hot stove, it’s time to kick back with one of my favourite hobbies…

…Photography! “Yeah baby, give it to me, give it to me!” (I’m referring to the treat which the Missus is holding).

CLICK. Gotcha!

Phew, all of that driving, cooking and photography has got me bushed.

Time to relax with some music. (My favourite tunes are ‘Who Let the Dogs Out?’, ‘How Much is That Doggy in the Window?’, ‘Puppy Love’ and anything by Snoop Doggy Dog).

Unfortunately, the music just makes me…

…sleepier…

…and sleepier…

…and Zzzzzzzz.