I always look forward to celebrating Christmas. Do you want to know why? Well, first of all, I get to eat lots of yummy food and I get lots of Christmas presents from Santa. But, most importantly of all, I get the honour of receiving the ‘Turkey God’.
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| Woo hoo! Here's the Turkey God, resting on the chopping board in all of its glory! |
There was something strange about this year’s Turkey God though. He seemed a bit smaller than usual. Last year, for example, he weighed in at a whopping 24lbs/11kg. This year, however, he was a paltry (or should that be poultry – heh heh) 5kg! Don’t believe it? Well, take a look at last year’s photo of the Turkey God and you can do a comparison and decide for yourself…
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| Photo of Turkey God taken last year - he was MASSIVE! |
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| This year's Turkey God. |
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| Even though he was a little slimmer, I couldn't help staring in awe at the delicious, I mean holy, Turkey God. |
Soon the yearly ritual began. I went into a trance and started chanting deliriously…
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| Me chanting feverishly. |
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| Once the chanting was over, there was only one thing to do... |
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| I decided to kiss the Turkey God's feet! Unfortunately, the Missus wasn't very impressed by my show of devotion. |
The Turkey God mysteriously disappeared for a few hours, so I decided to go and check out my Christmas presents…
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| YAY! Look at my fabulous hoard! |
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| I got yummy treats galore... |
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| …as well as a tiny hippopotamus! |
Out of the blue, the Turkey God suddenly reappeared.
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| I'm not sure how, but he had developed a golden tan and was surrounded by those other demi-gods of mine - The Brussels Sprouts, Carrots and Roasted Potatoes gods. |
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| Oh my dog! I can't wait to get tuck in! |
Got to go now folks. There’s food to be eaten.
Merry Christmas everyone!
